To Bemoan and to Absolve

“Shut up, okay? I’m never gonna talk to you again. Get lost.” I banged on the phone, fuming. In the past one week we had hung up on each other more than what we had done in our 18 years of friendship. She is my best friend. She was in a new place and was finding it extremely difficult to accommodate herself to the new environment. She had chosen me to vent out her frustration. Not that I complaint of it, but she was not letting me help ease things for her. This is all I could stand. “If she doesn’t even try to pay heed to me, why should I even give a darn to what happens to her!”, I thought angrily. My brother’s mobile was playing Nelly Furtado’s  ‘All good things come to an end’. I thought miserably, our friendship was no exception too.

That evening my mood was so bad that I skipped my supper and went straight to bed. My sleep was very disturbed. It was late in the dusk. We both were sitting on our favorite bridge and talking happily just like good old times. As usual, she sat there squeezing my fingers just to see how much pain I could withstand. And I sat pretending it dint hurt one bit. I woke up from my sleep realizing it was all a dream. And I realized I was crying. I shouldn’t have done that. Not when she needed me the most by her side. I looked at the clock; it was just past 1.00 am. I called her up. I didn’t mind waking her up. All I wanted was her to know that I regretted having shouted at her and not having understood what she is going through. To my surprise, she picked up the phone in the first ring. She said “I knew you’d call Aishu. I’m really sorry. I should’ve been more understanding. I’m gonna try and listen to what you say. After all, you are my best friend.” She left me speechless. She had told all that I had intended to tell her. It felt great. We both spoke for another 40 minutes or so. And when I went back to bed, I was grinning recollecting all that we had spoken.

How many of us have gone through similar situations? How many times have we cried with that crunching feeling in our stomachs?  I bet everyone of us. When such a crisis rises, we pray for some miracle to alleviate our malady. But why is it that we flounder so much when it comes to apologizing? Why don’t we realize that before we conclude things about others, we should try and walk in their shoes? What obstinance stops us from forgiving?

It certainly is not very difficult to make new friends. But to retain them is paramount. To hold onto them throughout is profound. It is not every day that we find someone who accepts and loves us for what we are. After all, to err is human. It is these imperfections that make life beautiful.

Call up that friend who you had stopped talking to ages ago because of some silly misunderstanding. Browse through your mobile contact list. Make a surprise call to your schoolmate who was once your best friend but who you grew distant from cos you made new friends. To be the cause of someone’s smile is blissful. Make your presence felt. Make someone happy and feel special. Lets exile from within our shells of ego, and regret and make amends for all of our iniquities. After all, losing to a friend is not as bad as losing a friend. Is it?